When “yes” to your kids means “no” to your health. The hidden cost of saying yes to everything

I know this might sound a little controversial: although it’s wonderful for kids to be involved in after-school activities - aaaaad, obviously there's so many benefits, from building skills, confidence and teamwork... HOWEVER, the other side of this (and the part that is often not said out loud) is: when is enough, enough?

For my client Lisa, she struggled with saying no to her kids. Lisa wanted to give them the opportunities her own parents couldn’t afford for her.

But it came at a cost - her health.

Lisa had grown up in a traditional family with clear gender roles and continued this in her own marriage. Her husband was great, but she carried the mental load and responsibility of organising all the kids’ activities.

And with 3 kids, she was constantly driving between activities, eating meals on the run, and staying up late to wash, dry and pack uniforms for the next day.

She was running on empty.

Then, on the weekends, her time was filled with scoring matches, running canteens, or filling in because no one else put their hand up.

Does any of this sound familiar?

You may be ironing dance costumes, sewing uniforms, or managing the endless forms, registrations, medical notes, and payments.

If it doesn’t feel fair - that’s because it isn’t.

But while working with me, things began to change, and Lisa learned how to set boundaries and scale back her kids’ activities with less guilt.

She had a frank conversation with her husband, where they made decisions together about who was responsible for what - and for the first time, she didn’t feel like she was carrying it all alone.

Together, they then had the hard conversation with their kids, explaining that she was going to start prioritising herself as well as them.

It wasn’t easy. There was resistance - from her kids, and even from Lisa herself. But we worked through it together.

And the ripple effects surprised her.

✅ She was getting to bed earlier, able to slow down, enjoy downtime at night, and reconnect with her spouse.

✅ She had more energy and started practicing yoga or pilates in the mornings before the kids had even woken up.

✅ She blocked out precious time to prepare meals she’d always wanted to make - and we personalised this for her (including her grab-and-go glovebox snacks) so she was fuelled all day instead of grabbing food on the run.

✅ Her stress levels came down because the constant rushing had finally stopped. She was less snappy with her kids and her husband, and the mental chatter in her head reduced substantially.

Her relationships improved, and so did her family dynamic. Others in the family began to pull their weight - not “helping out,” but actually taking responsibility for tasks that made the household run more smoothly.

We streamlined this together, and Lisa gained confidence, felt empowered to have a voice, and put boundaries in place with her family.

She was given the respect she deserved.

Lisa finally had time to breathe - and her kids got to see what healthy boundaries look like in real life.

This is what my coaching does. It’s about giving you back the space to prioritise yourself, set boundaries, and create a life that works for everyone in the family (including you).

Imagine yourself 6 months from now - calmer, with more energy, less rushing, and finally having the time to care for yourself without guilt (ok, let’s be real here, with less guilt 😉).

Book a free chat with me to see how I can help you, just like I helped Lisa.

Em xx

Bach of Health Science (Nutrition & Psychology)

Anti-dieting Nutritionist for Women

Certified Mind Body Eating Coach

Remedial Massage Therapist